


Room #992 [AU]

by ImperfectOrphanage



Category: Subarashiki Kono Sekai | The World Ends With You
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-31
Updated: 2017-01-31
Packaged: 2018-09-21 05:43:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 15,769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9534188
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImperfectOrphanage/pseuds/ImperfectOrphanage
Summary: Psychology intern Neku Sakuraba has been assigned to the catatonic schizophrenic, Joshua Kiryu, who has been in the system since he was a child, due to hallucinations and outbursts.Unsure of his role, Neku quickly takes to Joshua, and the two become friends.However, things are never as simple as they should be in Shibuya, and the Game interrupts both of their lives.---Warning for psychological stuffs, hospitalization, general insanity, and a lot of personal experience that may not match up to everyone else's experiences with the world of psychiatrists.





	1. Chapter 1

The people of Japan rarely spoke about mental illness. It was one of those things to be ashamed of. If a person exhibited signs of being too different, they were usually hidden away like a dirty secret. Neku had read far too many case studies and stories from nurses and doctors about patients who were abandoned by their families with the hope they could forget the damaged person existed.

It was one of those things that rankled in Neku. He was heartsick, not just because of the multitudes of people who needed help, but because he had seen first hand what ignoring a problem could do.

“Mr. Sakuraba?”

Looking away from the window, Neku smiled to the receptionist as he approached the desk. “I’m Neku Sakuraba. Are they ready?”

“Dr. Minamimoto regrets to inform you he cannot see you now, but he has assigned you to a patient on the ninth floor. Your dorm is close, correct?”

“Yeah,” he said, then realizing it was rude, he straightened his spine, “yes, ma’am.”

“Good. The patient he has you with is in room nine-ninety-two, and he’s a catatonic schizophrenic.” The receptionist handed him the paperwork and an abridged file. “Dr. Minamimoto emailed you a copy of the report and you should have wireless access in the hospital for your tablet.”

“A catatonic?” Neku took the file, fingered through it, and tucked it under his arm. “What can I do with a catatonic?”

The receptionist smiled. “Dr. Minamimoto has faith in you. Though, I can’t help but ask, how long have you been in the program?”

“Oh, right,” he laughed, “I’m twenty-four. I know, baby face and all.”

She returned the laugh and motioned for him to go through the first set of doors.

Neku heard a buzz and he pushed through what many referred to as the last line of defense considering the next door led into the hallway. He didn’t like to think of patients as dangerous, but he had seen and read far too many things about how they could be. Either way, he had made a promise to his friend to try and help in any way he could.

The room he was assigned to happened to be on the opposite end of the hallway, past two more doors and a guard station. Neku smiled to everyone he passed, and he found the rooms were single cell rooms with a bed and a small bathroom. A tiny window peered into the room, and in the room was a thin strip of a window far too small for anyone to fit through. Even if they managed, the outside of the hospital had bars on the windows at level seven and above.

Neku peeked into the room. He saw a slight boy facing away from the door, shoulders hunched, sitting in the darkness. The boy didn’t move a muscle, even as Neku fumbled for his tablet to request the door be unlocked with his pass code. It took a few seconds and he heard a click.

Opening the door, he slowly crept into the room, eyes on the back of the patient.

He closed the door behind him and flinched when it locked. Neku was alone with a potentially dangerous yet completely zoned out guy.

“Hello!” He tried to sound cheery. “My name is Neku Sakuraba and I’m an intern therapist assigned to your case…Joshua? Is that right? Joshua Kiryu?”

No response. The boy-er, man, considering the file had him at the same age as Neku-didn’t move. He continued to stare at the pillow on his bed, back to the door, shoulders hunched, and lips moving quietly.

“So…yeah…uh, I’m new at this?” Neku saw a chair in the corner. It was bolted to the floor and it felt strange to sit in it. He unfolded the paperwork and set his tablet on another bolted piece of furniture next to the chair. It was supposed to be a table of sorts, but it was just a square with a post. “I’m doing my internship and I want to be honest with you that I-“

A glint of light. The sun peering through the windows reflected off the man’s lavender eyes and it was only then Neku noticed they were staring at him. His mouth moved, over and over, saying the same silent word.

“I’m sorry?”

His lips kept moving.

Neku knew it was stupid. He set the papers down on top of his tablet and moved closer. He craned his neck and tilted his ear toward Joshua. At first he couldn’t make out anything in the soft whisper. Moving closer, he was almost on the bed as he heard it.

“Out. Out. Out.”

“You want out?”

The man looked behind him before resuming his stare down with the pillow. “Out.”

Neku frowned. He glanced around the room. An idea popped in his head and he returned to the paperwork to read a few of Joshua’s symptoms. “Oh. Oh! You want something out? Is there something in here with you, Joshua?”

Again, his eyes glinted with light as he watched Neku.

“I guess I’m a something,” he laughed nervously. “Uh, Joshua? Do you know why you’re here?”

Joshua’s mouth twitched into a half-grin. He continued to stare out of the corner of his eyes.

“So, yeah,” Neku coughed. He sat back down and continued to read the report. Maybe Joshua would be more prone to talking if Neku just became a non-threatening entity in the corner of the room. His fingers slid over each page, the only other sound aside from Joshua’s whispers. Neku pulled his highlighter out and began to mark the notes before pulling the file up on his tablet. Shit. There was a lot to read.

“Out.”

Neku tilted his head up. “Joshua?”

“Get. Out.”

“Oh, right. It’s probably late and you-“

Joshua’s expression changed within a breath. The movement was so sudden and unexpected that Neku had no time to throw his hands up. Joshua had pounced him to the wall and was holding his arm against Neku’s throat with enough pressure to bruise. He snarled at Neku.

The door flew open and two orderlies rushed in to pull Joshua from Neku. He strained and screamed as if wounded. They threw him to the bed, one pressing their knee into his back as the other injected him with a quick acting sedative. Neku watched in horror, eyes caught on Joshua’s as he continued to growl and hiss two words, “get out, get out.”

“Sir, are you alright?”

Neku jerked. “Uh, yeah. I’m fine, just startled. Should I go? I mean-“

“Josh ain’t gonna talk to you,” the other said with a grin. “He’s off in space now.”

A soft snore from the bed. He was laying in an odd position.

“I…I think I’ll stay. It’ll help me understand him better.”

The two orderlies exchanged glances.

“Seriously. I’m fine. You came to the rescue. I need to do this.”

“It’s your funeral,” the bulkier of the two said as they left.

Neku took a deep breath. He gathered the papers and his tablet up to set back on the table. Before sitting down he went to Joshua’s side. It wasn’t hard to move him. He was skinny and the gown he wore hung loosely from his frame. Neku felt terrible for the guy.

Positioning him on the bed in a more comfortable way, Neku brushed a hand through Joshua’s hair and whispered to him, “I’m not going to hurt you.”

Joshua said nothing, his breathing even, and his eyes twitching in sleep.

“I’m not going to hurt you,” Neku said again. He moved back to the chair and settled in for a long night of reading the stack of reports several doctors had compiled on one Yoshiya Kiryu. Having been committed as a child around the age of eight, the boy quickly shut down. For years they had tried to reach him and eventually every doctor in the building under psychiatrics had given him up.

Neku didn’t want to admit defeat. Maybe that’s why Dr. Minamimoto had given Joshua to him.

It was somewhere between age twelve and age fifteen when Neku nodded off, head resting in his hand on the arm of the chair. The sun peeking through the window and the sound of a noisy cart coming down the hall brought him to consciousness.

At first, he was majorly confused as to where he was. One cursory glance around the room made him remember and he startled yet again to see Joshua.

The guy was sitting on the edge of the bed, staring straight at Neku.

“Good morning?” Neku offered.

Joshua turned his head toward the door. It opened and a nurse came in with a plate of mush and a bottle of water. On the tray was a paper cup filled with medication.

“Good morning, Joshua,” the nurse said. She was a kindly looking older woman. Her hand brushed Joshua’s cheek and he closed his eyes as if savoring the touch. “Here’s your medicine.”

He glared at Neku as he took the cup, downed the medication, and swallowed without water.

“Holy shit,” Neku said without thought. “I mean, there were at least seven pills in there.”

The nurse smiled. “Joshua, don’t be mean to Dr. Sakuraba.”

“I’m not,” he waved his hands, “a doctor. I’m just an intern.”

“Then you won’t mind helping him eat.” The nurse set the tray on the bed. “It’s oatmeal. He doesn’t chew very well. Just scoop and serve.”

Neku wanted to refuse. He was still a bit leery around Joshua. The guy seemed to hate him.

“Come on, hands on work is best.”

He sighed in resignation. Rising from the chair, he stretched, winced at the melody of pops and snaps his spine sang to him, and he took the spoon. “Okay. I’ll try.”

“If you need me I’ll be down the hall.”

She left with Joshua staring after her. He slowly turned his attention back to Neku the minute the door closed and latched. Neku tried to force a smile.

Joshua narrowed his eyes and clamped his mouth shut.

“Are you going to be difficult?” Neku knelt down, took a spoonful of oatmeal, and held it to Joshua’s mouth for several seconds. “It’s okay. I’m not going to force you. But it’d be better if you ate.”

He turned away, curling his legs up as he resumed the position he had the day before.

“I don’t blame you,” Neku said. “It’s not very good.”

He set the tray on the table next to the bed. After sleeping in the room he was not only hungry, but he had to use the toilet urgently. The bathroom was open to the rest of the room since the curtains could be used for suicide and there was always something creative to be done in the shower. Neku felt slightly weird using the facilities but Joshua wasn’t looking.

Once finished, he washed his hands and resumed his position on the chair to read. Breakfast would have been nice but he didn’t want to leave Joshua. There had to be something Neku was missing, right?

Thirty-minutes passed in silence.

It took Neku a moment to realize Joshua moving from the bed to the toilet wasn’t supposed to be a possibility but there he was, using the bathroom. Unfortunately, after he finished he stuck a finger in his throat and vomited the medication into the toilet. He glared at Neku, returned to the bed, and took the bowl of oatmeal into his lap. Facing the wall he continued to glare over his shoulder while he ate.

“That’s…kinda stupid,” Neku said. “You might feel better if you take your medication.”

“Fuck you,” he said, voice scratchy.

Neku blinked. He stared slack jawed at Joshua until the boy finished eating.

The tray was set on the bedside table and Joshua flopped down onto his side, facing the wall.

“Okay. That’s…unexpected.” Neku scribbled down a note on his tablet with a stylus. It was his personal stylus-a gift from his father. It was blue and yellow, and on the end a little charm of headphones dangled from it. Neku sighed.

“Do I bore you?”

“You’re kinda harshing my mellow,” Neku said. He shook his head. “Fuck, I mean. Uh…”

“You’re new, aren’t you?”

“I told you, I’m an intern.”

Joshua rolled to his back. “You’re a bit young.”

“So are you,” Neku returned.

“I don’t like you. I don’t know you. When are you going to leave?”

Neku frowned. He realized Joshua didn’t mean today, but forever. It was something his friend used to say in his darker moments. “I’m not leaving.”

Joshua made a noise of disbelief.  “They all say that.”

“Well, I mean it I-“

A sudden flurry of activity happened as Joshua flew up and backed into the corner of his bed while staring at the opposite corner of the room. His eyes were wide enough to pop and his mouth was contorted into a terrified, silent scream.

Neku couldn’t see anything. He set his things aside and moved to stand in the corner. “What do you see here? There’s noth-“

“Get out,” he hissed. “Get out, Neku!”

“Hey, you said my name,” he replied, smiling at Joshua.

Joshua shook his head. “You are going to die. In seven days. You are going to die. It’s seen you. It’s seen you! They’ll come for you. Oh, God, they’ll come for me!”

“Calm down, Josh, what’s coming?” Neku tried to approach as slowly as possible. He didn’t want Joshua to be sedated again. “Hey, it’s okay. I won’t hurt you.”

“No, no,” he whispered. “No. No. No.”

Neku could see the moment Joshua disappeared. His eyes clouded over and he began rocking back and forth saying no over and over. It remained for more than five minutes and Neku shook his head. He was gone and Neku didn’t know how long it would last.

Hunger assaulted Neku’s stomach and he collected his things before sending a message on his tablet to be let out and to have the tray taken away.

He didn’t mention Joshua vomiting the pills. He didn’t mention the lucid state Joshua had been in.

For some reason, he didn’t feel right about writing it in his tablet.

“Josh,” he waited at the door, “I’ll be back tomorrow. I promise.”

“Seven days,” the man whispered. “Seven days and dead.”

Neku made a mental note to research what the hell it meant. But first he needed something to eat and the biggest damn cup of coffee he’d ever drank. It was time to visit his uncle at the café.

Hopefully he wouldn’t make a big deal about the bruising on Neku’s throat.

\---

After a well deserved shower and a change of clothes, Neku left the apartment with his satchel filled with paperwork and his tablet. The walk to the café cleared his head, and though he was exhausted from sleeping in a metal chair, he was far too curious about his patient to think about sleep.

As usual, there were only a few patrons in the WildKat. Neku wasn’t sure how his father and uncle were able to keep the place open, but it made both of them happy and he wasn’t going to question that. The bell on the door chimed as he entered, and he saw his uncle standing behind the bar.

“Hey, Uncle Sanae, how’s the coffee?”

The man took one look at him and frowned. “You look like shit.”

“Thanks. You don’t look so good yourself,” he replied, taking a seat at the bar. He set his bag on the stool next to him and pulled his tablet out. It had a screen protector on it that-unless you held it at a certain angle-didn’t display the notes he read. “I’d like a big cup of crap coffee and the largest stack of pancakes you can manage. I haven’t eaten since lunch yesterday.”

“Why?” Sanae Hanekoma turned away to dig in the warming case. He pulled out a few pancakes, slapped them on a plate, and set them in front of Neku with a jar of syrup. “What’dya want in your coffee?”

“Beans,” Neku said, distracted. There were so many notes on the guy he couldn’t process it all.

_Joshua Kiryu at present exhibits withdrawn behavior and an inability to converse with the staff. There are signs he is mentally alert. In the past he claimed to see shadows in the corner of his room and at present, if he has a hallucination, he shuts down._

“Hey, Uncle,” Neku drew his finger on the screen to scroll the report up, “have you ever heard of a phrase, seven days and dead?”

There was a barely imperceptible twitch. “No, why?”

“Uh,” Neku narrowed his eyes, “no reason. Where’s Dad?”

“Stepped out to get a few things. You know how he is.”

“Probably got distracted with a vendor or a crane machine.” Neku smiled fondly. He continued to read, taking one pancake off the stack before curling it to take a bite. The report was thorough, and the last few pages were written by his mentor Dr. Minamimoto. Neku still wasn’t sure what the guy wanted him, just a lowly intern, to do.

He went to the supportive therapy section.

_Patient refuses therapy-will not speak with the therapist, noting they are going to die._

_Patient refuses group therapy-is room bound and when forced, does not contribute._

_Patient refuses to leave room-becomes violent if forced._

Neku sighed. He felt bad for Joshua. In the past notes it spoke of him being a happy child who loved to draw and paint. It was the pictures he created that frightened his parents, and on evaluation he told them about the things he saw.

_Reapers._

_Noise._

_Players._

None of it made sense to Neku. He did, however, made a note to take Joshua something creative to see if he wanted to draw. Neku knew they wouldn’t allow pencils or paper, but he had an old, personal tablet he used for drawing.

A thought occurred to Neku. If he’d been in the hospital since he was eight, he probably didn’t have a lot of experience with electronics.

It was all the more reason to introduce him to a tablet.

“So,” his uncle said, “what’s the patient like?”

“Doctor patient confidentiality won’t let me tell you details but,” Neku took another bite of pancake, “I feel kinda bad for him. He’s been there so long and the only people to visit him are therapists and doctors.”

“I got an idea.”

Neku looked up. He saw his uncle rummaging through a cabinet. He pulled out a small box of wafers and a small bag of cookies.

“I know it ain’t protocol, but try sneakin’ these in to him. It might soften ‘im up. I don’t think he’d be able to do anything violent with food. Also,” his uncle grinned, “nice try on the high collared shirt but I see that bruise and you’ve gotta be careful.”

“There’s a camera in the room. If he moves too fast they’ll come to rescue me. I just feel bad that their answer for everything is a shot and medication.”

“I feel ya.” His uncle tucked the food into Neku’s overburdened bag. He also tossed in a plastic bottle of juice and a box of pocky sticks. “Tell the kid it’s okay. Y’know that secret job I got?”

Neku nodded. It was never discussed, but his uncle apparently worked for a man who was rarely seen and who only talked to two people-Neku’s father and uncle.

“Tell the kid y’know the Conductor. I’m sure if he’s seein’ what I think he is, it’ll help.”

“I don’t understand but I trust you. I just wish you’d let me know what the hell is going on with this secret job of yours.”

“Told ya, it’s confidential.” Hanekoma grinned like a cat and turned away to clean a few dishes.

In the back of the café, the door opened and closed, and the sound of merry singing followed. Neku knew without looking it was his dad, Shiro Sakuraba, and he was probably singing because of a good run on a crane game or a capsule machine.

“Neku! Heya, kiddo!”

Neku looked up to see a big plush toy of a purple zebra. “Uh, okay?”

“I won it! I won a lot, actually. I saw these videos online that showed how to mess with the machines and I cleared it out. Here,” he offered the zebra to Neku, and a round, green pig to Hanekoma, “I got you something, too.”

Hanekoma smiled. He shared a kiss with Shiro and Neku couldn’t help but reflect the smile.

It was always cute to see his father and his adoptive uncle share a moment. Neku had chosen to call Hanekoma uncle when he was just five and his mother had passed away. It would have been far too confusing to call both of them dad, and the barista seemed to like the name.

“I also got a lot of little toys,” Shiro said, excited. He set a paper bag on the counter and rifled through it to show his lover all the little things he’d won. “Oh, and I won one of those Pokeman things.”

“Pokemon, Dad,” Neku corrected. “And that one is Pikachu.”

“Really?” Shiro eyed it critically.

It was palm sized and fuzzy, and Neku wondered if it would be safe to smuggle it into Joshua. Well, maybe not smuggle it in. The guy hadn’t had a bout of suicide since he was twelve, so it couldn’t harm to give color to his room. Most of the other long term patients had decorations in their rooms so long as they hadn’t been suicidal and were taking their medications. The items had to pass a certain list, but Neku was sure he could take it.

“Hey, can I have it? I have a patient that might like it.”

Shiro blinked. “You got a patient? Congratulations, kiddo! I’m so proud!”

“T-thanks,” he said with an embarrassed smile. “It’s just one patient.”

“My baby boy,” Shiro mock sobbed, “is growing up so fast.”

“I’m twenty-four, Dad.”

“My baby.” He sniffled, and hid his face into Hanekoma’s shirt. “Oh, how tragic!”

Neku laughed. His dad was such a drama queen. “Okay, okay, stop. I’ve gotta go. I told Joshua I’d be there tomorrow but I think I might drop by today.”

“Good luck,” his two dads said in unison.

“Thanks,” he replied, taking the two plushes and his satchel with him after tucking the tablet away. “I’ll be home for dinner. What’er we having?”

Shiro paused. “I didn’t take anything out to thaw. We can get curry!”

“Curry’s good.” Neku walked toward the door. “See ya’ll later!”

The bell chimed and he stepped out onto the sidewalk just as a gentle breeze flew by to rustle his hair and clothing. He felt good about today. He wasn’t sure why, but a positive feeling began welling up within his chest and he began to whistle on his way back to the hospital.

\---

He came back.

Joshua was impressed. Most of the interns the doctor sent would leave within a day or two.

But here he was, standing at the door, waiting for it to unlock.

Joshua turned away, facing the wall, hoping the bastard would leave him alone and not stay the night like he had. It was confusing to Joshua, since no one had ever stayed the night. He managed to break out of the sedatives halfway through the evening and he had watched Neku sleep.

He had soft, orange hair pulled into a ponytail at the back of his neck. His skin was slightly dark, and his eyes were a brilliant blue. The clothes he wore were too big for him. His shirt-even today-was a pale dress shirt with a fancy bowtie. Joshua wanted to smile at the hilarity, but it meant showing emotion and he refused to do anything to make them think he was getting better.

“Good morning, Josh! I brought some contraband for you.”

Joshua eyed him. He snarled and glared, and hoped it would frighten Neku off.

It didn’t.

“Come on now.” Neku had his satchel on one shoulder, and two plush toys tucked under his arm. Once he set his bag down next to the chair, he offered both of the toys to Joshua. “Here, I brought a gift. Don’t worry, I told the nurse about it and they said it was okay.”

Joshua frowned. He wanted to reach out. He wanted to take the purple one. His fingers twitched.

No. Don’t. He’ll see emotion.

“I know you want it. I can see it in your eyes. It’s okay,” Neku said, kneeling, “you can have them.”

Joshua’s heart sank. Shit.

“Here, I’ll put it on the table.” Neku set both of them on the bedside table. “This guy here is a Pikachu. Do you know what Pokemon is?”

He shook his head no.

“That’s cool. I’ve got another present for you but I can’t let you keep it when I’m not here.” Neku moved to the chair. He brought the bag to Joshua before sitting in the floor with his legs in a lap. In the bag was an older tablet with scratches on the back. Neku placed it on the bed and pulled out a few snacks and a bottle of fruit juice. “My uncle said you’d like these. He told me to tell you, I know the Conductor?”

Joshua flinched. He started to back away.

“I don’t know what he meant,” Neku didn’t seem to notice as he was digging in the bag, “I mean, he’s got this secret job with my dad and they don’t tell me anything. But I know they see this guy who’s super hidden and doesn’t deal with people much, but he’s-“

“Composer.”

Neku looked up. “Composer?”

Shut your mouth, Joshua. He doesn’t care. He’ll leave like the others. He’s going to call you crazy and he’ll try to stuff you full of medication.

“It’s alright if you don’t tell me. Here.” Neku took the old tablet and turned it on. He started an application and handed it to Joshua. “It’s an art program. I used to use it a lot. You can draw and paint with your finger. There’s a few colors here and the pencils-“

“Why do you care?”

Neku’s gaze was far too innocent. “Huh?”

“Why do you care?” Joshua took the tablet regardless. His finger brushed the screen and a blue streak appeared. “I don’t like you. I don’t know you.”

“It’s okay. You’ll get to know me.”

Joshua drew a line. “I don’t want to.”

“That’s fine, too. I’m going to let you do whatever you want today. Eat, drink your juice, play with your stuffies, and you can do whatever you want on the tablet. There’s more applications there.”

“I am not a child.”

“I know,” Neku said. “But you didn’t get to be a kid. I think it’ll help you feel more comfortable.”

Joshua continued to draw. It felt weird to do it with his finger. “What do you hope to accomplish?”

“That’s not my decision. It’s what you want that matters.”

“I want to be left alone.” Joshua turned away. He kept the tablet, and he took a bag of cookies.

Though he hated to admit it, he was beginning to like Neku. It had only been a day and a half and yet the guy didn’t act like a doctor. He acted like a friend. Joshua hadn’t had a friend in so long he wanted desperately to reach out, but it frightened him to display what he felt.

His emotions, his hallucinations, and his reactions are what put him in the hospital.

Neku settled against the bed. He seemed comfortable in the floor and the tablet he was reading had streaks across it due to the filter on the screen. The stylus he was using caught Joshua’s attention and he smiled a bit at the bouncing headphone charm.

“Do…” He stared at the wall. “Do you like music?”

A gentle movement and Neku sighed. “Yeah. I love music. I used to listen to it every day but I’ve been busy with school.”

Joshua said nothing in return. He found the art program was calming his nerves.

Silence reigned in the room until the middle of the day. Joshua knew it was lunch because the cart was being pushed down the hall. Neku moved toward the door and he smiled and laughed with the nurse in the hall before taking a tray for Joshua.

“Okay, we have peanut butter and jelly,” he said. “I don’t know if it’s any good.”

Joshua waited for the cart to go down the hallway. “It’s terrible.”

“I’ll take your word for it.” He set the tray on the table in front of the plushes. “So, how do you like the tablet? It’s got some games on it. There’s one called Tin Pin and I think you’d like it.”

Clicking the home button, Joshua scanned the apps on the screen. There was one labeled Tin Pin, but there were others such as Paper Toss, and Booklet. He opened the latter and his eyes widened at the collection of books both non-fiction and otherwise. There were so many. He hadn’t been able to read in years and there was a library in his hands.

He chose a book and began reading.

Neku was sitting against the bed again, but his head began to bob. Eventually he fell asleep with his head on his chest.

Everything inside of Joshua screamed for him to ignore it. It screamed for him to hide within his mind and to keep his emotions in check. Put the tablet down. Close your eyes. Ignore the world. Leave Neku alone and shut him out before you get hurt. Joshua, don’t. Don’t.

His hand twitched. He touched Neku’s hair.

It was as soft as it appeared and his hand stroked the hair over and over and over. Neku didn’t seem bothered by it as he was still quite asleep.

Joshua shook his head. He turned the tablet off, placed it on the bed near Neku, and he curled on his side to go to sleep. The room buzzed with silence and Joshua shivered at the emptiness he felt in his heart and mind. He could hear in the distance, the sound of Noise and Players fighting. It frightened him and he remained as still as possible.

A snort, and Neku woke up. “Oh, shit. I’m sorry, Josh. Are you-“

He must have seen Joshua turned away from him. Neku sighed, and a hand touched Joshua’s hip. “I’m not leaving you, Joshua. I promise. I won’t leave you.”

Joshua said nothing. He ignored Neku until the day passed and the man decided to leave. He had to take the tablet, but he left the plush toys and the snacks.

The door closing had never bothered Joshua. It had made him feel safe and secure.

But today…it felt cold. It felt lonely.

Don’t get close, he repeated over and over, don’t get close.

It’ll hurt too much when you lose him.


	2. Chapter 2

Neku wasn’t sure why he was quiet on the third day. He didn’t talk, he didn’t eat, and when he refused to take his medication, Dr. Minamimoto had to be called to try and talk to him. Again, he continued staring at the wall showing no signs of noticing anyone’s presence. Because of it, he was given an injection.

Dr. Minamimoto had told Neku it would be useless to stay with Joshua, and offered to drive his intern back to the dorm, but Neku refused.

“He needs me.”

“I don’t know about that,” the doctor had said. “Are you sure you’re not getting too close?”

He didn’t answer. It had been at least an hour since they’d left Neku alone with Joshua and he still didn’t have an answer. Joshua was still sitting in a hunched position, staring at his pillow, but he held the purple zebra in his lap and his hand continued to stroke it’s mane.

“Hey, Joshua? Are you hungry?”

No response.

“I thought I could sneak something in from the café if you wanted.”

He continued stroking the zebra, mouth moving silently.

“It’s okay. Do-“ Neku paused, unsure, “do you want me to tell you about my experiences?”

Joshua slowly blinked.

“It’s too quiet in here.” Neku set his books aside-he’d been studying medications-and he moved to sit next to Joshua on the bed. The blankets were stiff and not at all warm, and the lamp above flickered and hummed as if it were about to go out. Neku curled his legs up on the bed and kept at least an inch between his hip and Joshua’s back.

“So, uh,” Neku fidgeted his fingers together, “I had a friend. He was a lot like you. I mean, he wasn’t catatonic he was just blunt. He…he was a nice person though. I really liked being with him. It was weird because he didn’t have any other friends. He was such an intelligent person I didn’t understand it.”

Joshua moved slightly. His hip brushed against Neku’s.

“We were ten,” Neku whispered. “I still can’t get the image out of my head. It was so sudden.”

Slowly, Joshua’s head turned. “Did he die?”

Neku jumped. He hadn’t expected a response. “Yeah.”

“How?”

“I don’t think it’s wise-“

“Oh, I see,” Joshua coughed, voice raw, “he killed himself.”

Neku stared at his hands. He could still see the blood and the bits of brain and teeth. It made his fingers twitch and his arms tremble. “Yeah.”

A quiet moment passed between them. Joshua reached for the Pikachu plush and he placed it in Neku’s lap, back still facing Neku. He turned back to stare at the wall. “Was it traumatic?”

“You could say that,” Neku said, half-laughing at the tender action. He patted the plush and played with the lightening bolt tail. “It was bad. I wanted to help people. I didn’t understand why he didn’t tell me he was having problems. I thought he trusted me.”

“You can never trust people.”

“I don’t think that’s right.”

“Neku, do you think,” Joshua fell quiet for a minute, “you could get me something to eat?”

“Yeah, sure, whatever you want.” Neku smiled. Was he finally getting through to the guy? It was a start, at least. “I think the cafeteria has some great food. It’s better than the stuff up here.”

Joshua moved on the bed. He turned to face Neku, eyes red rimmed and filled with exhaustion, and he reached a pale hand out to touch Neku’s face. His fingers slid down his eyelids and lips. “I want something to eat, Neku. I want something to eat.”

The hand moved over and over. Neku realized he was still caught in a catatonic state. He didn’t do anything about the touches. Perhaps it would help Joshua-

It stopped. Joshua blinked. He touched Neku’s mouth. “What do you like to eat?”

“My dad makes this amazing omelet with all sorts of things stuffed in it. But I like nuggets and sometimes I like pancakes and coffee. My uncle owns a café.”

Joshua tilted his head. He leaned in, staring at Neku with only half and inch between them. His breath smelled odd from not drinking water and from refusing to brush his teeth. Neku didn’t want to move in case it frightened Joshua.

“You know the Conductor?”

The question was soft. Joshua sounded afraid. He pulled away from Neku and held the zebra plush in his lap with both hands.

“My uncle says he does. I guess I do by proxy but I don’t know who exactly it is.”

“Can you,” Joshua held the plush to his face as if to hide, “tell him to leave me alone?”

Neku frowned. “What do you mean?”

Again he hid behind the plush, eyes averted to the side. “I don’t want to see the Game.”

“The Game?” Neku had seen something mentioned in Joshua’s notes about the Game. It was some strange life or death struggle where people were given missions and if they failed, they died. The doctors had thought it was Joshua’s imagination at first, but they soon learned the child was having hallucinations. Nothing they gave him worked, and the mix of medications he was on now, were less for the hallucinations and more for the catatonia and the outbursts.

Joshua shook his head. “It’s nothing.”

“I’ll tell him.”

Lavender eyes darted up to stare at Neku from under a messy fringe of blonde hair. “You will?”

Neku nodded. “I promise. I’ll tell Uncle Sanae and Dad.”

“Thank you. I have something to give you.”

“Oh?” Neku watched as Joshua pulled something from under his pillow. It was a small, silver bracelet made from the guy’s hair. It was braided and soft, and it fit around Neku’s wrist. He wasn’t sure if he should keep it, or if he should tell someone because if Joshua could weave a bracelet he could weave something far dangerous out of other things.

But he didn’t. He smiled. He took the bracelet with thanks and ran his finger over it.

“I made it years ago. Neku, I’m hungry.”

Neku squeezed Joshua’s hand. “What do you want to eat?”

“Neku? I’m hungry.”

His eyes were unfocused. Though Joshua seemed to be fighting his madness, his eyes clouded and he repeated the word hungry.

“I’m sorry, Josh,” Neku said. He pulled away, set the Pikachu plush back on the table, and decided to gather his things to go to the cafeteria. Even if Joshua couldn’t tell him what he wanted to eat, Neku was hungry, and he might see something the guy would like. “I’ll be back. I promise.”

“Hungry,” he said, blinking slowly. “Hungry.”

Neku exhaled. He left the room and went down the hall. It was late, way past dinnertime, and Dr. Minamimoto had told him not to stay the night with Joshua. Though he wanted to, if his mentor refused to let him he had no choice.

But he would come back. He wanted Joshua to eat something-anything-since he had refused for so long to eat and a nutrional shot might as well have been water.

Maybe he would get Joshua some pudding, or jello. Then again, they had the best frozen yogurt and those little square pizzas. The cafeteria often had chicken pasta and nuggets, and they always had salads. The thought of all the food made Neku’s stomach growl loudly.

He ate more than he should. He ate two square pizzas, a box of nuggets, and a cup of pudding.

Later, he smuggled Joshua a cup of jello, a box of nuggets, and one of those small juice boxes.

The next day, he found the items consumed, the trash on the floor, and both plushes in Joshua’s arms as he slept. Neku decided to leave him alone for a couple days. He had course work to do and his dorm room was in need of cleaning.

Joshua would be alright for a few days.

Well, he hoped he would be.

\---

“He knows?”

Standing before the Composer, Sanae and Shiro exchanged worried glances. The Composer huffed and took a seat on the silver throne, one arm on either side and one leg curled over the other.

“This is not unprecedented,” the Composer continued, leaning his head on one hand. “I believe the Composer twice removed from me was also sensitive.  It is unfortunate, however, that the boy is locked away from the world. Perhaps we should free him.”

Sanae frowned. He knew what the Composer meant.

Erasure. Reincarnation. Possible ascension if the former failed.

“Sir, I don’t believe it’s necessary. My son, Neku, he is-“

Cold eyes turned to Shiro. “Your son. Why you chose to have children is beyond me. What does your son possibly hope to accomplish? You cannot drug the ability from a person.”

“Sir,” Sanae stepped forward, “I believe he could be able to talk him through it.”

The Composer laughed. It echoed around the Room of Reckoning and turned into the chattering of many sour voices. “Quite like those before him? No. This situation must be dealt with.”

“Sir!” Shiro stepped in front of Sanae, nearing the throne with his head bowed. “I beg of you to give my son time. It isn’t right to Erase someone simply for existing.”

“He is a threat.” The Composer stood, placed a hand on Shiro’s head, and sighed musically. “The boy has the ability to overthrow me if given the chance.”

Sanae shook his head. “I won’t let it happen, Boss. If Neku is able to get him out of the hospital, we can take care of him. Perhaps we could seal his powers if he gains further control over them.”

“No,” the Composer said flatly. “I want him brought to me if you two are incapable of completing your job of protecting me.”

Shiro glanced up at Sanae before looking at the Composer full on. “Sir, may I offer a third suggestion? We could play a Game.”

“No!” Sanae grabbed his husband by the arm and shook him. “Some kid isn’t as important as the Composer is, and I sure as Hell ain’t lettin’ you die.”

“I’m not going to die.”

“Then what,” the Composer grinned, “would you be putting up for trade?”

“I,” Shiro bit his lip before blurting out, “I offer my son as an Entrance Fee. If he can’t bring Joshua around to stability in six months, you can have them both.”

“Shiro!” Sanae shook his head. “How can you-“

“It’s not an easy decision!” Shiro barked. He whirled away from Sanae. “I promise, Composer. Please allow me to hold the timer. I’m afraid it would confuse Neku.”

The Composer nodded slowly. He settled back on the throne, gossamer gown fluttering around him. “I accept your challenge. Neku Sakuraba has six months to stabilize Joshua Kiryu or I will Erase them both and force ascension.”

Shiro cried out as the timer burned into his palm. He stared at, fingers trembling.

“You idiot,” Sanae said, taking Shiro’s wrist in his hand. “Why?”

“Because,” his husband paused to take a deep breath, “no one deserves to be Erased for existing.”

Sanae exhaled. “Shiro.”

“This should be interesting.” The Composer clapped his hands. “Shiro, Sanae, I will expect results. Further, both of you have been sent the paperwork for this week’s Game. Please do not disappoint me.”

Both of them bowed. “Yes, sir.”

Sanae waited in the Room of Reckoning after Shiro had left. “Sir?”

“Yes, Sanae?”

“Is there nothing else I can do?”

“My dear Producer,” he sighed, sounding almost loving, “you should never get close to those who have connections to the RG. They are useless, you know.”

Sanae frowned. He rubbed the back of his neck. “I hope you’re wrong, Boss.”

“I rarely ever am.”

\---

The next time Neku visited Joshua, he was feeling a bit catty.

Neku had peeked through the window of the door and he didn’t see Joshua. He looked to the left and the right, and still nothing. But the moment he opened the door, Joshua was directly in front of him.

“Gah!”

“My, you should see your face.”

He coughed, sucked in a breath, and let the door shut. The light above was dim as one of the bulbs had burned out in the time Neku had been away. “Shit, Josh. It’s not funny.”

Joshua smiled. “It was. Have you brought me something?”

It had been two to three weeks since Neku had been assigned Joshua and every day he came to see him was another surprise. Joshua had been catatonic for most of it, but little things had changed in the room.

“Yeah, I brought the tablet,” Neku said, pulling it out from the bag to hand over. “Have you been feeling alright? The nurse said you’ve tried eating.”

“The food is detestable.” Joshua sat down on the bed and began playing with the piano application to tap out a few notes. “I want you to bring me more food from the cafeteria.”

Neku couldn’t help but smile. He settled down on the chair as he did almost every single time he’d come to visit. “You could say please.”

“No,” Joshua said. He hummed along to the song he was playing.

It was a song Neku had never heard before. He let it become background noise as he began taking notes on Joshua’s condition.

_Patient is well and conversing with little difficulty. Patient demanded tablet the moment I showed up but this is a good sign. Patient is interested in music and art. Patient thought it was funny to try and scare me. It was a non-violent interaction, but the playful attitude makes me feel positive he can change._

“Neku?”

He looked up. “Yes, Joshua?”

“Do you think it would be safe to go outside?”

Holy shit. Neku had read about how Joshua hated to leave the room. For the guy to ask to go outside was far too good to be true. It had to be a test. It had to be.

“That’s entirely up to you, Josh. You could go to group therapy or maybe one of the craft classes. This week they’re making sculptures.”

“No, not this ridiculous place.” Joshua clicked a few things on the screen of the tablet and held it out to face Neku. “I want to go here.”

Neku stood up to take the tablet. “You want to go to the Scramble?”

“Yes. I want to see the Game firsthand.”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea. I mean, you’re still afraid, right?”

Joshua stared at him innocently. “When you are with me, I am not afraid.”

A gentle flush spread over Neku’s cheeks. He handed the tablet back. “Dr. Minamimoto won’t let me take you from the hospital grounds. You could go to the garden. I could walk with you.”

“Do you think I could go further one day?”

Neku swallowed hard. He wanted Joshua to be a functioning adult. He wanted Joshua to be able to leave the hospital and live in a group home or with a nurse until he could stand on his own. He wanted Joshua to be happy, and he certainly wasn’t happy in the hospital.

Not only that, but this would be the first time Joshua admitted to wanting to leave. He had hope, and he hadn’t had hope when Neku had started caring for him.

“Yeah. I think so. It’ll be a while but I’m sure-“

He could have sworn Joshua’s eyes were glowing when he stared up at Neku.

“You will be dead in five months. We need to move quickly.”

Neku flinched. “Wait, what?”

The guy turned away and began singing to the song he was playing on the tablet as if he hadn’t said a single thing since the last note. Joshua’s voice was off-key and he continued to sing the same bar in repeat.

He stopped. He looked up.

“Neku? Do you think I can go to the cafeteria?”

“Do you want to go?” Neku pulled his own tablet up to send a message to Dr. Minamimoto. “I can see if they’ll let you. It should only take a moment.”

Joshua closed the application on his tablet, turned it off, and set it on the bedside table before standing up to adjust his gown. “I should put pants on.”

“Yeah,” Neku laughed. “It’s in the drawer.”

“Oh?” Joshua yanked the drawer open and pulled the green pants from it. “Oh. These are horrible.”

“I don’t think they have fashion contests here.” Neku heard a ping and he smiled at the note. “He said I can take you but only to the cafeteria. Do you feel comfortable?”

Joshua was staring at the pants he’d put on. “I suppose.”

“We can take it slow. Here,” Neku put his tablet under his arm, “take my hand.”

\---

The door opened.

Joshua stared into the hall.

He hadn’t left his room for years. If he became sick or needed a shot, they brought it to him. The food was brought to him three times a day. His medication came to him twice. He was given the necessary items to clean and wash, and he was given new gowns and blankets.

The door was large. It seemed to swell as he stared at it. He was small. He was growing smaller.

Neku’s hand squeezed his.

The door was normal. He was normal.

“Are you ready?”

Joshua nodded dumbly. He wasn’t. He wasn’t. He wasn’t.

“It’s okay, I’m with you.”

“I want,” Joshua looked over his shoulder, “Pikachu.”

Neku smiled. He didn’t tease Joshua. He didn’t laugh or call Joshua stupid. He simply left Joshua at the door to retrieve the plush. “Here.”

It was soft in his hands. Joshua closed his eyes, held the plush to his face, and sobbed.

“Hey, it’s okay. Josh, shh,” Neku put an arm around his shoulders, “it’s okay. Shh.”

“I have to do this.” Joshua rubbed at his face. “I have to do this.”

“You don’t have to,” Neku said, soothingly. He reached out to cup Joshua’s face in his hands and he stared into Joshua’s eyes with a kindness Joshua hadn’t seen in so long.

Joshua closed his eyes. “I want to go.”

“Then we’ll go,” Neku whispered. He took Joshua’s hand again, and he stepped out into the hall. “Come on-one step at a time.”

His body trembled. He placed one foot outside the door. The floor felt as if it would collapse out from under him and he screamed and ran to the window. “No, no!”

Neku didn’t judge. He simply stood and waited. When an orderly and a nurse came to check on them he held a hand up. “It’s okay, guys. He’s trying.”

The hand remained up long enough for Joshua to see the faded red numbers on his palm.

He had to do it. He had to do it or Neku would die.

Joshua didn’t want Neku to die. He barely knew the man but he was tender. He was kind and tender and he didn’t put up with Joshua’s shit.

“I’m coming.”

Neku held his hand out.

Joshua stepped forward to take it. He put one foot into the hallway. The floor was solid.

He put the other foot into the hallway.

It made him shiver. Not from fear, but from the cold. He hunched down a bit, looking at the ceiling and the others in the hall in fear.

“I’m with you,” Neku said.

The words were comforting. The words focused Joshua and he stood to his full height.

“Good!” Neku smiled, proud. “You’re in the hall. Good job, Joshua!”

He felt like a child. The nurse clapped, the orderly grinned, and Neku squeezed his hand.

Joshua tried to smile but he had forgotten what true happiness felt like. He managed to twitch his mouth into a smirk, but his eyes-he knew-were smiling. They walked hand in hand down the hall to the elevator and Joshua began to feel brave. The halls had been so large the last time he was out and about.

There was music and laughter on the second floor, where the cafeteria was. There were people gathered in the lunch area eating and talking to each other as if nothing were wrong.

Joshua winced. He could see it.

“Noise,” he whispered. “Neku, Neku, there is Noise.”

Neku stood in front of him. He blocked Joshua’s sight from the orange shapes. “It can’t hurt you. Remember, I know the Conductor. I talked to them. He won’t let them hurt you.”

“Do you promise?” Joshua leaned in. “Please, Neku.”

“I promise. Hey, if you want, I’ll tell the room-“

“No, I don’t want attention,” Joshua said quickly. He tucked close to Neku. “I want to sit in the corner where there isn’t much light.”

“The round booth? Yeah. But we need to get food first.”

Joshua nodded slowly. He could smell so many good things. It filled his senses and he felt overwhelmed from the amount of things he could eat. There were puddings and jello, there were cakes and cookies, there were piles of pasta and salad, and there were small boxes of nuggets and fries. Neku had given him his own tray. He held it stiffly until Neku told him to put it on the bars to push.

The tray squeaked a bit as he pushed it down the line. Neku pointed out the different foods and asked if he wanted any of them.

“I want all of them.”

Neku laughed. “You can’t eat that much. Today, we could have…this one?”

It was a plate of chicken fingers and fries. It wouldn’t involve silverware.

“I want two,” he said. “May I have two?”

“Sure.” Neku took two plates and put them on Joshua’s tray. He took one for his tray and also grabbed a couple pieces of bread.

The trays continued down the line and Joshua stopped when he came to the vegetables. “I want this one and that one.”

“Sure,” Neku said again. “Turnip greens and beets?”

“They look disgusting.”

Neku made a face. “Then why do you want them?”

“I want to try them.”

Another smile. Another plate was added to his tray.

In the end, Joshua’s tray had overflowed onto Neku’s. They took them to the register and Neku paid from his own account for the food. If Joshua had known it cost money, he wouldn’t have gotten so much, but Neku said it was fine and he was just happy to have Joshua out of his room.

They sat in the booth Joshua wanted to sit in and he could see the entire room.

It made him feel safe to have his back against a wall. He took a french fry, bit into it, and sighed.

“I haven’t had hot food in such a long time.”

Neku had a mouthful of salad. He nodded.

“Mother and Father used to take me to Sunshine on the weekend.” Joshua took another bite before stuffing the fries in his mouth five at a time. “Oh, this is too good.”

“Don’t eat too fast,” Neku warned, “you’ll get sick.”

“If I get sick,” Joshua stuffed another fry into his gullet, “I can eat more.”

Neku laughed heartily. “Oh, my God, Joshua. That’s not the point.”

He quirked another awkward smile and continued to eat. He’d managed to swallow several chicken fingers and all of the fries before moving to the vegetables. Joshua hated the beets. They were far too tart and the turnip greens had a rather odd texture but he liked them.

“Oh, I feel horrible.”

“I told you,” Neku said. He’d finished long before and was writing down a few notes on a paper pad.

Joshua burped. He took a sip of soda and burped again. “No, I feel horrible because I won’t be able to eat the dessert.”

“That’s not a problem. We could pack it up and take it with us. Do you want to go outside?”

Looking at Pikachu, Joshua poked his nose with a finger. “It might be too much too soon.”

“No problem. Do you want to stay here for a bit?”

Joshua nodded. He watched the people in the cafeteria. There were always so many people no matter the time. He sat for an hour or more after eating and there were still the same amount of people in the room. Eventually, there were chimes in the overhead music and it alerted the patients to return to their rooms and for the doctors to do their final rounds for the day before shift change.

“Do I have to go back?”

“Yeah,” Neku sighed. “I’m sorry, Josh. But you did great today. I’m really proud.”

Joshua could still see Noise in the room but they didn’t appear to want to bother him. They were attached to the people they hovered over, and the people seemed to be upset. Joshua tilted his head.

“What’s wrong?”

“The Noise are attached to the people. I don’t think they want to hurt me.”

“It’s okay to see those things. I mean,” Neku was staring at his notebook, “I see stuff all the time.”

Joshua frowned. “Neku, what do you see?”

“It’s the craziest thing. You wouldn’t believe me.”

“Between the two of us, Neku, you are not the one who is crazy.”

“You aren’t either,” Neku said, smiling. “Nah, it’s nothing.”

Joshua exhaled, burped, and reached for a small square of cake. He stuck his finger in it and pulled the frosting to his mouth to taste. “I want to know.”

“I see these colors. It’s like,” Neku waved his hands, “auras? You have a gentle aura. I swear my dad and uncle have wings. I don’t like talking about it. It doesn’t bother me and the only person I told was my friend and he didn’t…he didn’t like talking about it, either.”

“I think it sounds nice.” Joshua placed his sticky hand in Neku’s and squeezed. “I know Dr. Minamimoto doesn’t want you to stay with me. Will you be back tomorrow?”

“I thought, maybe, if you were up to it, you could meet my parents? I mean, my uncle and dad. Since you got out of your room, we could have a little meeting in a visitor room and they could bring some snacks from the café. Oh! My uncle makes these art pieces. I think you need color and light in your room.”

Joshua blinked slowly. He could feel the fluff rolling back into his mind. Don’t do it. Don’t meet them. Don’t let Neku become your friend. He’s not going to stay with you. He hates you, Joshua! You’re a freak and a failure and-

“STOP!”

Neku sat straight up. A few of the people in the cafeteria glanced at Joshua, but quickly returned to whatever they were talking about.

“Please, stop,” he whispered, holding his head. “Please.”

“Hey, Josh, look at me.”

Blue eyes. Brilliant blue eyes. Beautiful blue eyes.

“The voices are not real. I am real. You are real. This room is real. Look, here,” Neku knocked on the table with his knuckles, “the table is real.”

Joshua nodded quickly. He felt sick. “I don’t want to hear it.”

“You don’t have to listen to them. Hey, listen to me. You’re fine. You’re safe and you’re fine.”

He wanted to reply. His fingers curled into his hair as he tried to keep focus. Joshua could see Neku’s hand, reaching out to hold his, but the timer glowed and ticked. No. Neku. No.

“I am not leaving you alone.”

Joshua snapped his head up. Blue eyes. Blue eyes. Blue eyes.

Focus.

Blue eyes.

Joshua, don’t listen to the voices.

Blue. Eyes.

It’s okay. You’re safe.

Neku.

A strange calm came over Joshua. He stood up, wobbled, and began to fall. He didn’t hit the ground.

He simply landed in darkness.

The next moment he recalled he was in bed.

Safe. Warm. Comfortable.

But Neku…he wasn’t there.

“Five months,” Joshua whispered into his pillow and the top of Pikachu’s head. “Five months and Neku will die. I don’t want him to die.”

He closed his eyes, whimpered, and for some reason he felt a gentle presence in the room.

“Joshua, I won’t let him die.”

The voice was soothing. It wasn’t like the other voices. It sang to him. It calmed him to sleep and even after he had begun to dream, the voice continued to sing.


	3. Chapter 3

The garden was a mystical place. It had all sorts of flowers, grasses, and trees. There were winding trellises of roses and vines where tiny bees would buzz back and forth. Butterflies fluttered around from flower to flower, and even person to person. There were quite a few people in the garden, sitting on benches, sitting in wheelchairs, standing near fountains, and collected into little groups.

Joshua hadn’t been outside of the hospital since he was twelve.

Because of this, his legs were a bit weak and Neku had to push him along the curving path in a rickety hospital wheelchair. It didn’t bother Joshua. He wanted to see so much and if he’d been left to walk he wouldn’t have made it far past the door.

He’d taken Pikachu and the zebra with him. Neku had let him borrow his phone to take pictures of the flowers and trees he liked, with the promise of printing the pictures out for him to put on his wall. Joshua would have bounced with excitement if he weren’t an adult.

A tiny, blue butterfly landed on his hand and Joshua stared at it as the wings opened and closed.

He exhaled and the butterfly flitted away.

“Are you enjoying yourself?” Neku’s voice was brighter than the sun. “You need a little color. I didn’t realize how pale you were.”

Joshua said nothing in reply. He was too busy lining up a shot of a tree with huge, pink blossoms. It smelled wonderful and if Joshua could have, he would have recorded the smell in the picture.

“I have a surprise for you. I thought, since you’re out and about, you’d like to make more friends.”

“Friends?” Joshua set the camera down. He patted his plush toys and squeezed them together in his lap on top of the scratchy blanket on his legs.

Neku stopped pushing the chair. He knelt down at Joshua’s left side and pointed at a picnic table. “Uncle Sanae and Dad decided to drop by to see you.”

He squinted his eyes. There were two men sitting at a table with an array of delicious looking food. The dark haired, stubbly one was grinning at the other, and the red-haired one laughed. Joshua could tell the red-haired man was Neku’s father. They looked incredibly alike.

“Do you feel up to it?”

Joshua wasn’t sure. Neku had mentioned knowing the Conductor and it was entirely possible one of the men was him. He strained his vision and tried to pull on what the others called hallucinations to see much further than Noise. Fortunately, there weren’t many Noise in the garden.

But he felt strange staring at the men. The stubbly one glowed silver. He had a pair of angelic wings spread out from behind and they shimmered in the sunlight. The red-haired one had more traditional Reaper wings and they were huge. Red and blue hues faded together and the wings twitched as if noticing Joshua.

It was frightening. Joshua wanted to run. He wanted to scream and run. These were the men who had been tormenting him over the years with the ability to see the Game. He wanted to hurt them. He wanted to run the distance between and pounce on them both.

“Hey, it’s okay,” Neku’s voice brought Joshua’s mind to focus. “You don’t have to.”

Joshua shook his head. “I need to. I don’t want you to die.”

“I’m not going to die. How long do we have now?”

He grabbed Neku’s hand and spread his palm open. “Four months and two weeks.”

“What do you see?” Neku took his hand back to turn it this way and that. “I don’t see anything.”

“It’s a timer. The Players have them. If you don’t fulfill conditions, you will be Erased.”

Neku nodded. “I understand. Do you want to go?”

“Please take me to them.”

The wheelchair squeaked as Neku began to push Joshua toward the two men. Joshua’s hands gripped the arms of the chair and he started to tremble the closer he got.

“Heya, Kiddo!”

Red-hair. Neku’s father.

“Howdy, J.”

Black-hair. Neku’s uncle.

“Guys, I want you to meet Joshua. Is it okay for them to call you that?”

Gentle presence. Neku.

“I should introduce myself,” Joshua said, words breathy. “Yoshiya Kiryu. You may call me Joshua. Which one of you sent the snacks?”

Neku pushed the chair to the table and moved to sit opposite his parents. “That’s Uncle Sanae. The one who got the plush was Dad.”

The red-haired man stuck his hand out. “Nice to meet you, Josh! I’m Shiro Sakuraba. Neku’s my baby boy.”

“I am not a baby,” Neku said, deadpan.

“Sanae Hanekoma,” the black-haired man said. He also put his hand out.

Joshua stared at them both. He touched one with a finger. “Thank you both for the gifts.”

They nodded and sat back down, hands pulling back. Neither one of them appeared to be put off from Joshua’s bad manners.

The red-haired man-Shiro, Shiro-was a mess. His clothes were rumpled and he must have thought plaid was a good thing to wear with his skin tone. A pair of gold glasses kept slipping from his nose and his hair was also pulled back as Neku’s was. Sanae Hanekoma, the one with the angel wings, was a barista, and it showed.

Sanae smiled politely and drew his hand above the snacks. “Behold, I brought ya some stuff.”

“I made the pancakes,” Shiro said, pointing to a plate with five or six cakes on it. “Neku loves pancakes, don’t you, Son?”

“They’re easy to eat.” Neku began piling a small amount of everything onto a plate. “I’ll let you try them first and then you can tell me what you like.”

Joshua nodded. He watched the plate fill and his stomach gurgled in question. A plastic fork was offered to him and he tilted his head down to bless the food. It was something his parents used to do and for some odd reason he felt it needed to be done.

He took a bite of a dollop of chocolate with yellow cream. It was sweet, almost sickeningly so, and he coughed. “Ugh.”

“Okay,” Neku made a note on a pad, “no Bavarian cream.”

Joshua poked a tiny cake covered in green fondant. It was a petit-four. He knew what it was because his mother used to have tea sessions with her friends. Joshua had only been three at the time but he remembered the little cakes.

He pushed the fork into the cake and popped it into his mouth.

“I like this one.”

Neku again made a note.

He went through several things from donuts to cake to cookies and savory slices of meat. The others had begun to scoop food for themselves. Joshua pointed at a few things and Neku filled his plate back up.

“Neku, are you trying to fatten me up? We eat too much.”

“Josh, I don’t think you could ever eat too much. You barely fit into your pants.”

He looked down. “I concur but you also do not fit your clothes.”

Sanae laughed. “I told ya.”

“Oh, shut up, Uncle,” Neku huffed, but there were no barbs behind it. He took a bite of food and chewed with mock irritation.

It was calm. It was quiet. It was everything Joshua wanted for the moment.

A feather landed near his plate and he picked it up, turned it from side to side, and gasped as it disappeared in a sparkling of light.

Neku hadn’t noticed, but Sanae Hanekoma did.

He smiled. He winked.

“Which one of you,” Joshua bowed his head slightly to avoid eye contact, “is the Conductor?”

“I don’t think-“ Neku began.

His father cut him off. “It’s okay, Neku. It’s a secret between friends. I think you know who it is, don’t you, Joshua? You can see it.”

“Dad, it’s not good to feed into his delusions.”

His uncle shook his head. “It’s not a delusion, Kiddo.”

Joshua wanted to pull back. He wanted to run to his room and hide. It was dangerous to be around these two men and he felt panic well up in his chest. He trembled, he shook, and he did the only thing he could think to do.

He stabbed Shiro with the fork. It sank into his hand and the man yowled in pain.

“Joshua!” Neku fought for control of the fork. He yanked it away. “Joshua, no. You don’t stab people with plastic forks.”

“I could stab him with other things.”

“That’s not the point,” Neku ground out. He looked at the wound on his dad’s hand. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, it’s no big deal.” Shiro wrapped a napkin around the injury and smiled at Joshua. “It’s okay. You didn’t know, right? I’m not mad. I’m not. You’re okay.”

Joshua could see where Neku got his calm and collected attitude. He grit his teeth and curled his hands into fists. “I don’t want to see it. I want you to stop bothering me. I don’t want to see it!”

“Stop it,” Neku warned. He rose, took Joshua’s chair by the handles, and began to pull him away from the table.

He wouldn’t let him. Joshua grabbed onto the table and fought to remain. His hands slid over the wooden surface and when he couldn’t hold it, he tumbled from the chair and scooted under the table. “No! I’m not going back and you can’t make me!”

One of the many nurses in the yard noticed and she turned to one of the orderlies nearby. He began coming closer and Joshua screamed in anger. His arms wrapped around Shiro’s leg and he kicked when Neku tried to coax him out from under the table.

“Leave me alone! I don’t want to see it! Let me go!”

The orderly yanked him out, and despite holding onto Shiro’s leg, he was pulled away.

“No! I don’t want it! Let me go! Let me go, you fucking assholes!”

The nurse came close, she pulled a needle out and with the orderly’s help, jabbed it into Joshua’s hip before pushing the plunger down.

“No, no! I don’t want-“ Joshua felt dizzy. “I don’t want. I don’t want! Neku, I don’t want you to die! You can’t let Neku die! Please…oh…oh…please…uh…nnn…”

He fought the sedative. He fought it with every cell in his body. The last thing he saw was Shiro’s blue eyes and he managed to mumble out, “don’t let him die, please.”

“I won’t let him die, Joshua.”

As the darkness closed in, he recognized the voice.

It was the same voice from the night he woke up alone.

\---

Dr. Minamimoto had refused to let Neku visit Joshua for several days after the event. Instead, Neku made rounds on the other floors, talking to patients, keeping up with their treatment plans, and making adjustments as necessary. He worked with the other interns, and they joined group sessions to audit how the therapists and doctors managed things. At lunch, he ate with several of his classmates, and in the afternoon he spent time talking to the children in the psychiatric ward about what they were afraid of and how they could cope with the fear.

But behind all of the busy work, Neku missed Joshua. He was worried about the guy. They had managed so much together and now he was back under Dr. Minamimoto’s care. Neku continued to check the case notes and found Joshua had once again shut down. He refused to talk. He refused to eat. He refused to do anything the nurses asked him to. He didn’t wash, he didn’t brush his teeth, and he was soon put on a suicide watch when he managed to slice his wrist on a sharp corner of his bed.

Neku wanted to see him, but if he went to Joshua’s floor, he was denied entrance.

It left Neku with plenty of time after work and during the evening hours. He spent it with his parents and at the café working on food with his uncle. If he kept busy, he wouldn’t think about Joshua.

But it was little solace. The second Neku was no longer distracted his thoughts returned to him.

Oddly, since he hadn’t seen Joshua, his right hand began to itch and burn, and the outline of a rash had begun to form on his palm. If Neku were any less sane he’d think it was the timer Joshua mentioned.

Around eight o’clock, Neku drowsed on the couch at his parent’s house. He closed his eyes, opened them, watched two seconds of television, and repeated. It took a moment for him to realize his phone was buzzing in his pocket, and he pulled it out to see the blurry numbers of the hospital.

“Hello?”

“Is this Neku Sakuraba?”

A female voice he didn’t recognize. “Yeah?”

“We need you to come into work. Joshua,” a pause, a change in tone, “he has been admitted to the emergency ward for an overdose. Dr. Minamimoto-“

“I’m coming. Tell him I’m coming.”

Neku didn’t wait for a response. He ended the call, tucked his phone back in the pocket of his sweatpants, and hopped up from the couch. Grabbing his keys and a wallet, he shouted to his parents in the back of the apartment before flying out of the door.

He hoped the bus was on time this late at night.

\---

The first thing Joshua felt was a buzzing in his head. The second thing he felt was a hand on his, fingers and knuckles stroking over the back of it. The third thing, the most annoying thing, was the beeping of a monitor. Joshua fought to open his eyes and the low light of the room assaulted his head with a gentle throbbing pain. He squeezed his eyes shut, moaned softly, and attempted to raise his arm to block the light.

His wrist was caught.

He tried the other arm.

Nope. No good.

“What?” He slurred, mouth dry. “Where?”

Neku’s presence surrounded him. “Hey. Are you alright?”

The light above was still too bright. He peeled his eyes open and found Neku sitting close to the bed, wearing a messy pair of sweats in grey, with a random English word on the shirt. Neku’s hair was a mess and he appeared to be exhausted, but his eyes were lively.

“Ugh, what happened?”

Neku’s hand brushed through Joshua’s hair. “It’s okay. You’re in the hospital.”

“I was already in a hospital,” Joshua slurred. He wanted to sit up but his bound hands restricted his movement and he groaned in response. “Why am I here?”

“You don’t remember?”

Joshua’s head was full of cotton. The memory of hot blood running down his wrist dance through his mind and he remembered cutting his wrist. He barely recalled what happened later, where he regurgitated his medication up to hide in his pillow. How many pills had he taken?

“It’s okay. We’ll get you better.”

“You left me,” Joshua whispered. “You said you wouldn’t leave me and you left me.”

Neku gripped Joshua’s hand. “I’m sorry. They wouldn’t let me visit. Dr. Minamimoto thought it would be detrimental to your recovery and I was sort of punished for bringing you snacks and letting you have a fork out in public. I won’t leave you.”

“How much time is left?”

The room went silent aside from the hospital equipment. Joshua turned toward Neku to see him staring at his palm as if he, too, could see the numbers.

“It hurts,” Neku whispered. He held his palm out toward Joshua.

3:13:5:20:01

Three months. Thirteen days. Five hours and twenty minutes.

He couldn’t save him. He couldn’t save Neku. It would take too long for Joshua to be free and he couldn’t be with Neku to protect him from the Noise. He strained in the bed. The bindings at his arms twisted into his skin and he arched upward with a cry. Neku tried to calm him but it did no good.

“You’re going to die and it’s all my fault.”

“No, Josh, I’m not going to die. I promise,” Neku said, placing his hand on Joshua’s chest to hold him to the bed. “Stop. You’re going to hurt yourself.”

Joshua growled. He was angry. He was livid. The things he saw had always bothered him but now they were going to take away the only person he could understand. The only person who cared for him more than as a patient would die. Joshua had spent so long in darkness and now…now he was able to move and talk and think on his own because Neku’s presence calmed him, and he would be thrown back into the darkness with the loss of his friend.

“Please,” he begged to no one. “Please, tell the Conductor. Tell him. Tell him to take me instead.”

Neku attempted to keep Joshua from thrashing. His hands were tender and he stroked one of them down Joshua’s sweat dotted face. “Shh. It’s okay. I’ll tell him.”

He would die. Joshua knew he would die.

“Please,” he whispered. “I need to talk to him.”

Neku sighed. He dug in his pocket and pulled his phone out. “Who?”

“Your father. Call your father. I need to talk to the Conductor.”

“My dad? He’s not-“ Neku shook his head. “I’m not going to argue. Here.”

He held the phone to Joshua’s ear. It rang twice and on pick up Joshua did not wait for the man to introduce himself. “This is Joshua. I want to be Erased. Erase me, not Neku.”

“Kid?” Shiro’s voice was surprised. “I can’t do that, Joshua. It’s…it’s already started.”

“Tell the Composer,” Joshua begged, “please tell him.”

“I can’t.”

“PLEASE!” Joshua arched on the bed, wrists aching as he struggled. “Tell the Composer!”

Neku ended the call and put his phone back in his pants pocket. He pressed Joshua’s shoulders to the bed and called to a nurse to bring him something to help Joshua relax.

“No! I don’t want to go to sleep!”

“Hush, Josh. Now I mean it. You have to stop buying into these delusions.”

Joshua froze. “You don’t…you don’t believe me?”

“I want to believe you, Josh,” Neku’s voice was tired. He glanced at the floor. “I can’t see anything.”

A needle plunged into the IV line and soon he felt drowsy. “I believed you, Neku. I believed in what you could see. You don’t believe what I can see? I don’t need you.”

“Josh-“

“I don’t need you.” Joshua whipped his head to the side, facing away from Neku. “You don’t believe me and I don’t believe you.”

Neku’s hand touched Joshua’s arm. “I’m sorry. I believe you I just…it’s not good for you to focus on the things you can’t control. The Noise? The Reapers? Have they ever hurt you, Joshua? Have they ever noticed you or tried to interact with you?”

They had noticed. It had frightened Joshua when he was a child. They would watch him. Some would smile and some would glare at him. The Noise left him alone. At least, all of the Noise except for the pig Noises who seemed to like Joshua’s presence.

The Conductor and the Producer did nothing but try to help him. They had brought him food and gave him gifts as consolation for the suffering he endured.

“Neku,” he sucked in a breath, “do you think the Composer would talk to me?”

“I don’t know the Composer,” Neku said, voice still rough with irritation, “but I can ask the Conductor if you want.”

Joshua nodded slowly. His cheek rubbed against the pillow and he felt a wet spot growing from the tears pooling in his eyes. “I want to be free.”

“I want you to be free, Josh.”

His eyes slid to the corner to fill his vision with blue. Neku was tired. He was tired and he was drawn and yet he had come to see Joshua.

Neku cared. Neku cared when even Joshua’s parents had not.

He had been selfish. For years upon years, Joshua had been selfish. He blamed the others for not seeing what he saw. He blamed his doctors and the nurses for not believing in him. He hated the orderlies for treating him like dirt and he hated his parents for abandoning him.

It was their fault. For years it was all Joshua could think.

But it wasn’t. It wasn’t their fault for not seeing the things Joshua would not wish on anyone.

He was selfish. He was incredibly selfish.

The people in his life…they should not be the only ones to change.

Joshua had to change. He had to accept his fault and attempt to integrate it with his life.

“Neku. I…I’m sorry for being selfish. Do you forgive me?”

“Huh? You’re not selfish, Josh. You just don’t understand how to control your delu-your power.”

Power. He’d never heard it called power.

“You think I have power?”

“Joshua,” Neku smiled, hand stroking his forehead, “your power is the only thing people cannot take from you. They can take your freedom. They can take your will. But not your power.”

“Do you think I will get out of here in time?”

Neku shrugged. He seemed to be thinking when a look of clarity rolled over his features. “Holy shit, I just realized something. You can see the stuff and you can kinda interact with it, right?”

“Yes.”

“You’re afraid I’m going to die?”

“Of course. You have a timer.”

Neku began to pace in the small area between the wall and the bed. “You can interact with the Game…but can you change it?”

“I haven’t tried to. I mean,” Joshua tried to move his arms again, “it’s futile at this point.”

“This Game, it’s for the dead, right?”

Joshua titled his head. “What are you getting at?”

“I’m not dead.” Neku patted his chest, just in front of his heart. “I’m not dead, Josh. I can’t be in the Game if I’m not dead, right?”

“But,” Joshua closed his eyes, “someone made a bet on you. The only reason your timer is as large as it is, is because someone made a bet on you.”

Against orders, Neku unbound Joshua’s left arm before unbinding the right. He helped Joshua to sit up in the squeaky bed and he held his hands out to Joshua.

“Take it away.”

Joshua was confused. He stared at the timer. “Take it away?”

“You’ve got the power to do this. I believe in you. I know it’s crazy but if you see it, and you can interact with the Game, you can change it.”

His fingers hovered over the timer. He traced one number after the other.

Take it away.

Joshua spread his hand over Neku’s. He focused his mind. He could feel a press of energy. It filled his senses and he felt dizzy as the wall between worlds faded at the edges. Joshua whispered, his voice calling in song, and he trailed his fingertips over Neku’s skin.

“Ow, shit!”

The timer was gone. The numbers faded and disappeared beneath Joshua’s hand.

“It…it went away.”

“Good job, Joshua. I’m proud of you.”

He looked up into Neku’s eyes. A warm feeling filled Joshua’s chest and his heart swelled.

“I did it. I interacted with the Game and it didn’t hurt. Neku, I did it.”

“You did,” Neku said, and embraced him as a friend would. No, as a brother would.

The room felt light. The energy around Joshua was strong and thick, and it no longer shivered and shook with fear. Joshua was powerful. Joshua felt powerful.

Of course, he also felt tired, and he fell asleep not too long after the ordeal.


	4. Chapter 4

A storm was brewing in Shibuya. The veil between the UG and RG had been tightened by the Composer and the current Game was put on hold. Sanae was worried, but Shiro was even more so. Rain had begun to pound on the roof of the WildKat, and the wind whipped around the street. People took refuge under awnings and in shops, and the sky lit up as a rumble of thunder shook the building.

“He’s pissed,” Sanae said, flinching slightly. “Shit. He’s pissed the fuck off.”

Shiro shook his head. “He’s not pissed. He’s livid. The timer disappeared, Sanae. Our hands are being forced. What should we do?”

“I don’t know.” The barista leaned on the counter. “I don’t know.”

“I don’t want to Erase the kid but if he’s interacting with the Game…”

Sanae tossed a towel at the sink. “Yeah. Not to mention, Neku’s in danger as well. They both got too much information and that kid…”

A child entered the café. He was no older than six or seven, and he climbed up onto a barstool before glaring at both of them. “You two owe me an explanation.”

“Uh, well,” Shiro rubbed the back of his neck, “you see, uh…”

“Boss, it could just be a fluke. He’s still unstable an’ he’s probably just messin’ around.”

The Composer narrowed his red eyes and thumped a fist on the counter. “I don’t particularly care what he is doing. I want his Erasure immediately. He is a threat. Also, because you saw fit to undermine my command with this foolish bet, I want your son Erased as well.”

“Sir,” Shiro began to argue. He clamped his mouth shut.

“If you do not, I will do it for you, and you may join him.”

Sanae shook his head. He didn’t like this one bit.

“I will do it,” Shiro finally said. He faded from view.

“Finally, someone is listening to me,” the Composer sighed. He twirled his wrist in the air and brought a cup of coffee to sit in front of him. Taking a sip, he smiled over the rim of the cup. “Now, now, Sanae, brighten your mood. I have reasons for what I am doing.”

“You’re bein’ an asshole.”

The Composer laughed. “Oh, Sanae. You fail to see the big picture.”

“I see a lot of things,” he said, “and it’s all addin’ up to a big pile o’shit.”

Again, his Composer laughed. “I do love you. It should not take long for Shiro to do as I asked but I would require one thing from you. Bring the souls of the Erased to my loving embrace. I want to play with them before I decide what to do.”

A twinkle of light and the Composer disappeared along with the coffee cup.

Sanae growled. What the Hell was the bastard planning?

\---

“Oi, Joshua! What the Hell are you doing?”

Yoshiya Kiryu of dimension three-nineteen looked up from the strange sphere of light. He saw his Conductor at the doorway of the throne room, and he looked none to happy. Joshua leaned back in his throne and tilted his head curiously. “Yes, Neku?”

“You’ve been in here for hours. What are you doing?”

“Nothing much,” Joshua said, waving a hand. “I was looking in on one of our counterparts. In fact, the story was about to take a turn and you are interrupting it.”

Neku snorted. He came to stand next to Joshua before sitting on the arm of the throne. He peered into the ball of light and frowned. “I can’t see anything.”

“That’s because you aren’t a Composer, dear.”

“I came to get you for dinner. Sanae cooked and he wanted to talk about a collaboration.”

Joshua perked up. It had been less than a month since Neku’s coming of age but they were already experimenting in a shared relationship. He smiled, kissed Neku’s cheek, and waved the ball of light away.

“I suppose the story can wait. I’m going to make you squeal to Heaven.”

His Conductor flinched. “Josh…you’re weird.”

“Come along then,” he said, and took Neku by the hand. “I’ll tell you how the story began.”

\---

There would be no graves.

The only person in the direct Sakuraba family to have a grave was his wife and his parents. He had lost the right to exist in the RG as he had the minute he became Conductor. Sanae had his own story, being an angel from the Higher Plane, and now, Neku and Joshua would be wiped from the earth.

No names. No relations. No folders of documentation and years of work to become something more.

Neku was sleeping next to Joshua. His head rested on Joshua’s chest, and Joshua had his arms curled around Neku as he, too, slept. The pair were adorable together. Shiro didn’t want to disturb them, but he had been ordered to deal with the threat.

A skinny, blonde boy with sunken eyes and skin so pale it was as paper.

“I’m sorry,” Shiro whispered. He placed a hand on both of them and closed his eyes.

Erasure was gentle. It didn’t hurt, but it did frighten if the person was a Player. But these two were living beings in the RG. Erasure would pull them further and further into sleep until their hearts ceased to beat and their chests stilled. The two would disappear from the world and the Composer would weave a story around their past existence.

Shiro had eliminated threats before.

It never got any easier.

The two souls rested in his hands and he could see the faint, purple light of Joshua shining on the blue of Neku’s soul. They twisted together like frightened children, and the purple ball of soul surrounded the blue and absorbed it. Joshua was still trying to save Neku, even in death.

“I’m sorry, guys.” Shiro glanced at the room. It was empty. The bed was made, the monitors were in standby, and the curtains were drawn back to wait for another patient. Shiro faded into the music of Shibuya and danced back to the River with his son and his son’s friend cradled in his arms.

The Composer sat on his throne with a book splayed out in front of him. He was reading in another language and his eyes scanned back and forth as he did so. He perked up when Shiro neared and waved the book away. He seemed far too excited to hold the warm ball of light.

“How beautiful they are. I can see how Joshua protects his friend. Such a change,” the Composer said, “as I can see the torment in his soul. Neku is adorable. I can tell he is your son, Shiro. Thank you for listening to me. I do hope you aren’t mad.”

“He had a future,” Shiro whispered. He reached out to run a finger over Neku. “He was my son and I didn’t want him mixed up in this mess.”

Tilting his head curiously, the Composer smiled. “Shiro, you think this is punishment?”

“Well, yeah.”

“It is far from it. I have made a decision. It would be unfair to send these gentle souls to Heaven for reprocessing and reincarnation. They are not quite adequate enough for angelic duties. I will reform them,” the Composer said, letting the ball of light hover in the air. “I want you to council them. Neku and Joshua are as important to me now as they are to you. The two of them will become Game Masters after a short stint in the Game as Harrier Reapers. I do trust you can handle this?”

Shiro balked. He blinked and moved his mouth like a fish out of water. “But, sir…”

“It is far better to keep your enemies close.” The Composer took a seat on the throne and crossed his legs. “Do you agree?”

“Yes, of course. But…why? I mean, you wanted them Erased-“

“I can’t change my mind? I suppose a simple minded Conductor cannot grasp the breadth of a Composer’s thoughts and feelings.”

“No offense, sir,” Shiro straightened, “but you’re being an ass.”

The Composer giggled. He held his hands out and he sculpted the souls like clay. The two boys appeared floating with their feet above the floor. He had not brought them to wake, and he nodded to Shiro before disappearing from the room.

It left Shiro feeling elated but worried. He circled around the boys once. Gathering their energy into his hands he led them to the Pad where they would be crowned as Reapers and given the talk.

Idly, Shiro wondered what Sanae would think of this mess, but knowing the Producer he’d laugh his ass off and make everyone a cup of coffee.

“Neku,” he said, followed by, “Joshua.”

Two pairs of eyes opened. They stared in silence and Shiro placed a hand on their chests.

“You are formally accepted into the ranks of Reaperhood as instructed by the Composer of Shibuya.”

What a strange and interesting thing to happen.

\---

There were times Joshua thought back to how things had been before.

It had been three months since they transitioned into Reapers. He had found it frightening at first but with Neku at his side they quickly learned the ropes. Neku didn’t like Erasing people. Joshua found it harder still, but the thought that it could be Neku instead and he found no qualms about killing Players.

Well, it wasn’t killing. It was moving from one plane of existence to the next. It was for the good of Shibuya and her citizens. It gave Joshua and Neku points, since they worked as a team, and every little point helped them to further exist.

Joshua had found death an interesting life. It was far more fun to be crazy and free than to be crazy and locked in a room with nothing but your thoughts. He had worried and fretted about the Noise eating him, and after quite a few tantrums with Shiro, he fell into the role.

Noise were now at his command. He made friends with the ones he loved to use, and he often had several pigs following him.

Just as easily, Neku had stuck by Joshua without much complaint.

“I hated all the paperwork,” he’d said. “I’m kinda glad to be free of all that obligation.”

Before, it had never occurred to Joshua how Neku was also in a prison of his own creation.

They were free. They were free and happy and the work they did improved the world and Joshua had high hopes of working up to Game Master with Neku by his side. It would be unprecedented to have a pair of Game Masters, but it would make the Game itself harder, and by result, the world a more wonderful place in which to live.

Today, Neku was taking Joshua out for ramen.

Tomorrow, Joshua didn’t care what came.


End file.
